THE HIDDEN

I've been doing some research about aliens parasitizing people for an upcoming presentation at Kevin Geeks Out About... Aliens! this coming Friday, May 21. (Buy your ticket now. Kevin tends to sell out.) Of course, this is my favorite kind of research because I get to watch science fiction movies, and I LOVE science fiction!

After watching eight movies, I realize that I have too much material for a six minute lecture, so I thought I'd start up my parasite-themed explorations here with The Hidden, which isn't making it into my presentation.

HIDDEN CHARMS

These parasitic aliens come in two forms: slug-like organism, or golden vapor. In either case, the parasite enters the host through the mouth and is somehow able to control their body completely. The subjective experience of the host is not known, as no one has lived through an infestation to relate their experience.

How is a five pound(1) tendrilly, slimy slug, entering a hosts body supposed to posses and control someone while sitting in their digestive tract(2)? For that matter, I'm not sure I understand how a golden, sparkly, vapor would be able to control the mind and body of a person, either.

This man's burnt skin doesn't gross me out as much as

the alien coming out of his mouth...

.... and going into his!

Kyle MacLachlan gives Michael Nouri the vapors.

SIGNS AND SYMPTOMS

Signs and symptoms of slug infestation include:

1. Physical activity in spite of life-threatening disease or injury
2. Anti-social behavioral changes including robbery, physical violence, and murder
3. An appreciation of relatively obscure 80's punk music
4. Death

Practice safe oral hygiene! Don't let alien parasites embarrass

you with poseur rock and a boom box!

Signs and symptoms of vapor infestation include:

1. Low tolerance for alcohol
2. A fetching innocence regarding the proper administration of Alka-Seltzer.

Drop it in the water, silly.

TREATMENT

Unfortunately, treatment inevitably kills the host and parasite. The only known therapy for this particular parasitic infection is to kill the human host with a flame-thrower (see photos A and B). This will cause spontaneous migration of the slug from the host body (photo C). One can then terminate the parasitic alien via a space-age weapon that will vaporize the creature, but is ineffective on human tissue (photo D).

Photo A: apply flame thrower

Photo B: death of host is eminent

Photo C: slug leaves host via the mouth

Photo D: slug is vaporized

In this particular case, prevention is the best treatment.

1. Approximate weight.

2. Has anyone noticed that aliens parasitizing humans (Alien, The Hidden, etc.) are never excreted anally?

Mutation - Part Three

Emma Thompson as Alice Krippin. I bet she'll be playing Hilary Clinton within ten years.

CATCH UP

Here we are in Manhattan, sometime around 2010. According to I Am Legend, Dr. Alice Krippin has developed a cure for cancer by engineering a measles virus to kill tumor cells. Unfortunately, that's not all her virus is killing!

QUARANTINE!

In the movie, and in the future, Manhattan will be closed off and quarantined. Apparently the threat of this oncolytic adenovirus of Krippin's has "gone airborne" and one way to contain it is by closing off Manhattan.

Avoid long lines! Plan your out of town trips early.

For those of you visiting our fair isle of Manhattan before any hint of this viral-mutation-ruckus starts up, just remember that there are plenty of other airborne diseases(1) floating around our delightfully efficient subway system, just waiting to be sucked up into an unwary nostril of every rat, dog, and human(2) venturing into the underworld of the MTA.

This rat took the "V" (for VIRUS) train!

UNRELIABLE EQUIPMENT PROMOTES SPREAD OF VIRUS

If we want to leave Manhattan, through an official check point, we will have our eyes screened with a device that seems to show a magnified image of the iris, displaying bleeding, or something red(3), caused by viral infection. This would not cause the hemolacria discussed in Mutation - Part Two. The detection device seems somewhat questionable in terms of its accuracy. It tests Robert Neville's wife Zoe as positive for the virus and then at the insistence of Neville, they try it again, and Zoe gets a green light (literally).

First scan indicates viral infection.

Zoe gets the green light 5 seconds later.

Faulty equipment means that we who are infected but not symptomatic should be able to get out of Manhattan with no difficulty, infecting our friends and family in Brooklyn, Queens, the Bronx, Staten Island and New Jersey. Indeed, that seems to happen. By the year 2012, there are barely any non-mutated people left in all of the world.

TAKE THAT FINGER OUT OF YOUR NOSE!

I know what you're asking yourself ... will I get the virus? Who will be the first to come down with the mutating measles? Before the virus mutates and goes airborne, nose-pickers and eye-rubbers who have virus on their fingers will be the first to be infected.

Even heads of state are not immune from this mutated virus

or the temptation to stick their finger up their nose.

Next will be people who have touched an object touched by an infected person and people who have been sneezed on or coughed on by an infected person.

Should Junior stay with Gramma, or go to nursery?

Either way, we're doomed!

This means infants, toddlers and children in day care, and people in nursing homes will get it first. As the virus mutates toddlers and old people into violent bald superhuman panting veiny photophobes, the terms "ankle biter" and "crotchety old man" will have a whole new meaning.

Wow! I'm glad no one tries to turn smallpox into a cancer cure anymore ... oh, wait! They do!

Here's the link for

the article pdf

1. Tuberculosis can float in air for at least a couple of hours. Of course tuberculosis is a bacterium and not a virus. Neither will it make you a photophobe with super-human strength.
2. In the movie, we see that rats, dogs, and people are susceptible to this virus, while deer and lions are not.
3. My understanding of eye anatomy is weak, but I believe that any kind of capillary perfusion or bleeding under the cornea or around the iris would also cause visual disturbances. Anyone care to comment?

Mutation - Part Two

VIRAL MUTATION WILL LEAD TO THE END OF HUMANKIND

Thus far, in our examination of I Am Legend, we have established how viruses find opportunity for mutation, and what types of viruses are of interest to researchers for use as oncolytic adenoviruses targeted for cancer treatments. (If that sentence makes no sense to you, go to the Mutation - Part One blog entry, March 6. Or you can just read on.)

Has anyone noticed how many movies starring

Will Smith have medical themes and show off his hunky arms?

Exercise has been clinically proven to enhance immune system function.

THE FUTURE IS NOW

As established, I Am Legend relates events that are about to ruin our lives, happening as I write this... blog! Using the film to read the future, we find that some time last year, in 2009, Doctor Alice Krippin engineered a strain of measles virus (paramyxovirus)(1) in an attempt to cure cancer. According to the film, we should expect to hear any day about Krippin's 100% cure rate for cancer by using this new viral strain in her experimental treatments.

Emma Thompson as Doctor Alice Krippin

If we are on schedule with I Am Legend, this viral cure for cancer will mutate, running horribly out of control, infecting and killing us sometime this year. It seems that this mutated virus has an infection rate between 90 and 100%, depending on your statistical source.

According to Wikipedia, once infected 90% of us will die, 8% will turn into a horribly degenerated vestige of mankind, and 2% are not affected at all, but will be murdered by mutated humans.

Mutant human attempting to murder the uninfected (talk about mood swings!)

So the brilliance of I Am Legend is that the virus used to cure cancer not only mutates its own DNA as it gets out of control and "goes airborne," but also mutates the DNA of the human host. Our entire scenario is a double mutation! For you trivia buffs, run-of-the-mill measles virus is already "airborne."

Spring colors (like blue) are all the rage this

season for the raging pandemic!

According to the movie, at any moment in 2010, we will begin to feel the initial signs and symptoms of viral infection. Many viral infections start in the same exact way, regardless of whether they are lethal, or mutating, or not. Influenza, HIV and polio all start with fever, headache, body aches, malaise. This pattern is commonly described as "flu-like symptoms."

This woman has signs of infection

with a horrible mutating epidemic,

or maybe it's the flu.

But because this is a mutated measles virus, hacking cough, sore throat and runny nose should develop tout suite, or it could just be H1N1(link for photo below.)

Oh my gosh! She sneezed! It's going airborne!

It is not clear if people infected with the mutant virus get a rash like measles,

A measles rash on the back, from an informative

article in the New York Times.

but they do develop a permanent fever (possibly as a result of the mutated adenovirus' hyper-stimulation of the body's immune response) and an accelerated metabolism...

Monitoring metabolism in the film.

...and photophobia, just like measles. I should point out that photophobia affiliated with measles infection does not make the patient's skin smoke and burn.

Double mutation induced photophobia is due to strike

the New York area in 2012 or sooner. Note the smoking epidermis.

People infected by the mutant virus also go on to lose all their hair except for eyelashes, have increased muscular power(2), increased coordination, and display behavioral changes and mood swings.

Patients may be prone to violent outbursts.

Their pets may also experience mood swings.

There also seems to be a bleeding eye thing that presents itself as a sign of infection with the virus. This bleeding eye event should not be confused with the hemolacria experienced by the character Le Chiffre in Casino Royale (blog entry CASINO ROeYeALE).

Infection with Krippin's mutated paramyxovirus

leads to bleeding from the eyes. Now we know it's not H1N1.

Le Chiffre may be infected with evil, but this is

not the result of his hemolacria.

Next time we will track the spread of this virus through the general population.

1. Paramyxoviruses are a group of viruses that cause upper respiratory illnesses like measles, mumps. These are airborne viruses. According to Wikipedia, from Greek para-, beyond, -myxo-, mucus or slime, plus virus, from Latin poison, slime. Ick!

2. Enhanced muscular endurance is not documented in the film.

Mutation - Part One

DENIABLE STATISTICS

Although I have no source of reference to validate this statement, I'd say that 80% of mutations in the movies are caused by viruses. Let us examine one of these movies in great detail, as it provides interesting insight into the follies of science.

I Am Legend

I AM LEGEND PREDICTS THE FUTURE

The brilliant thing about I Am Legend is that the movie tells the story of a genetic mutation that will ravage the human and dog population, any day now. The fall of man is a measles virus genetically re-engineered by scientists looking for a cure for cancer.

Measles virus

People have known for more than 100 years that certain viruses have the potential to treat cancer and shrink tumors(1). As a matter of fact, the early part of the 20th century saw attempts to treat cancer with measles, rabies and smallpox. Using herpes virus to battle cancer is also of interest to researchers.

Herpes. Cure your cancer, make sex awkward(2).

KILLER VIRUSES

A virus is essentially a packet of genetic information for making more viruses. First the virus infects a target cell. Through a series of steps instigated by viral enzymes, the virus will insert its own strand of DNA (genetic information) into the DNA of the host cell. Viral DNA is now a part of the cell's genetic make-up and the host cell will get busy making new viruses. Any time the cell reproduces, it also reproduces the viral DNA in its nucleus as if it were its own.

For you trivia buffs, here's a representation of viral reproduction.

To over-simplify the process, using the tiny graphic, above:

1. The virus binds to the cell wall

2. The virus fuses with and enters the cell
3, 4, 5. The virus inserts its genetic material into the DNA in the nucleus of the host cell.

6, 7. The cell starts making viral components.

8. The cell assembles the virus

9. The new viruses start budding out of the cell membrane, going off to infect other cells.

Easy peasy!

WHAT DOES THIS HAVE TO DO WITH CANCER?

The general idea is that you engineer an oncolytic adenovirus to target only cancer cells. The virus infects the cell, uses the tumor cell to make more virus, and kills the infected cell as the new viruses burst out of it. The newly made viruses can then infect other local tumor cells, or travel through the bloodstream to infect metastasized(3) tumor cells in other parts of the body, and destroy them too.

Additionally, the use of these viruses in this process may hyper-stimulate a body's immune response. Heightened targeted immune response might lead to the body being able to fight its own cancer.

What could go wrong?

Mutation ... that's what!

Don't let this happen to you!

At least she doesn't have herpes.

OPPORTUNITY FOR MUTATION

During viral reproduction a lot of genetic coding is interrupted, replicated, inserted and re-replicated. All of these steps for making copies of viral DNA mean that there is a lot of opportunity for MUTATION. Not just people cellular mutation, but viral mutation, too.

Look out! I Am Legend takes place in Manhattan in 2012!

Coming up next - more about viruses and what to expect in two years!

1. Here is a link to a pdf of the article Virotherapy As An Approach Against Cancer Stem Cells, by Camilla Ribacka and Akseli Hemminki. Highly entertaining. As I read it, I found myself wishing that I Am Legend's Dr. Krippin (Emma Thompson), the virologist to blame for the entire horror-to-come, had been given a couple of lines reflecting a glimmer of what was written here. It wouldn't have to be too complicated, just something to make her sound more knowledgeable.

2. There are actually a few different types of herpesvirus out there, like the one that causes chicken pox. But the joke is better if it appears that you have to acquire a sexually transmitted disease in order to cure your cancer. Ha ha!

3. Cancer cells that have spread to other parts of the body.

THE AMAZING FIBROBLAST!

On Tuesday, I had the pleasure of giving a presentation at Adult Education: a useless lecture series. Carrie McLaren, Jim Hanas, and Charles Star curate, produce, and host this really fun monthly lecture presentation in Brooklyn.

The theme of the evening was Animal Minds, Animal Bodies. Keeping our mutation theme going, my contribution was a live version of my May 2009 Spider Palm entries from this blog. Here's the link, if you'd like to check out the description of Peter Parker's physical transformation.

Next time we will continue with mutation via the film I Am Legend!

KEVIN GEEKS OUT - Mutants #3

Me explaining hereditary mutations in Part 1 of my lecture.

Photo by the great Matthew Glasson.

THE INEVITABLE OVERTHROW OF THE HUMAN POPULATION,

DUE TO NOTABLE AND SIGNIFICANT INCREASES

IN ABERRANT CHROMOSOMAL PROLIFERATION OF MULTIPLE ETIOLOGIES

Part 3

From my Cinematologist lecture at Kevin Geeks Out: Visions Of The Future

Where were we? Oh, yes! In my last installment I had talked about inherited mutations, as documented above. Now we're on to acquired mutations....

Acquired mutations occur in the DNA of individual cells at some time during a person’s life.

Blonsky and Banner were not born this way, they were exposed to gamma radiation in adulthood.

Blonsky and Banner from The Incredible Hulk.

Notice Blonsky’s exaggerated cervical spinous processes.

Acquired mutations cannot be inherited. For example, skin cancer is caused by UV rays mutating genes in the skin, but if you have skin cancer lesions when you get pregnant, your baby isn’t born with skin cancer, he has to acquire it himself.

Sunshine

However, in order for the Hulk to pass on a genetic mutation, the sperm in his testicles would also have to be dosed with Gamma radiation. If Bruce Banner had held a lead apron over his testicles, his children would most likely be normal. If he wasn’t wearing an apron it is still impossible to predict HOW this altered genetic information will be expressed.

How will he express himself?

Additionally, having sex in either of his forms would not affect genetic expression.

Did he cover his testicles?

In 2084 When we set up colonies on Mars, mutation will advance by leaps and bounds. Thanks to miracles in modern science, acquired mutations due to inadequate radiation protection will become inheritable and PREDICTABLE, as demonstrated in the movie, Total Recall.

This girl has inherited a mutation

that her mother acquired!

However, according to films that afford us a vision of the future, disfigured mutants will not be valued by mainstream populations as deserving of respect. Additionally, reproductive success and the passing on genetic information requires that you find someone willing to have sex with you. Finding a reproductive partner is not a guarantee. It might be harder for some mutants...

If a woman married George/Kuato,

would she be guilty of polygamy?

... than for others!

This mutation may be successfully passed

along to future generations.

Which mutant species will dominate the planet? Which mutagens will be the downfall of humankind? What are the chances of human survival in the future? These are difficult questions. But if there is anything to be learned by scientific investigation it is this: In the future, as now…

Love will find a way!

Thus ends my Kevin Geeks Out lecture. Next time we plumb the viral depths of I Am Legend!